Hi it's me, Charlie Brown. I don't type so hot.

Big paws, I guess. I used to belong to the Robinson family. At least they thought I did. Truth is I just didn't like hanging around home all that much. Booorrring.

They thought they could keep me in the yard and even put up a wire fence that cost them 400 bones. Ha, I had a tunnel out of there in 15 minutes. They shudda known we are famous for rooting out rabbits.

She bought me for him from the Bassett family in Woodinville. Isn't that a howl. They raise dogs of the same name like somebody named fox raising - you get it.

A lot of people laugh at me because I look sloppy but I don't care. And they pet me, which is OK but not as good as scratching me under the collar.

Best times I had were when I snuck under the fence and headed for the tavern on Delridge. Those guys had good fun and laughed like hyenas when they put a saucer full of beer on the floor and of course, I gulped it down and they would do it again and pretty soon I got feelin' good. Then somebody always called a copper and I got to ride in the front seat without a belt (Because I had a few too many anyway. Get it?)

And the cop would drive me home because everybody in town knew where I lived. He never even lectured me.

One day my folks brought home a pretty fancy thing to keep me company and make me want to hang around. Named her Rumpydump and she walked funny. Kinda pitty patty. Real quiet. But cute. How was I to know she wasn't a dog? I never went to school. Anyway, each time I tried to get cozy she just swatted me in the chops. I thought I looked fancy when I sidled up in my brown and white baggy suit. Maybe it was the wrinkles. She made funny sounds. Didn't know how to yelp. Or bark.

Anyway, I figgered I made a boner and was ashamed to sneak into the house so I just left home for good. For a while I drifted around the neighborhood, no more beer, no more amorous ideas.

One day I wandered into a dog doctor's office in White Center and he could see I was somewhat out of shape and he took me in to a room that smelled like other dogs. That was exciting but he didn't have anything around like Rumpydump. So when he was not watching I slunk out the door and decided to find the Robinsons again.

They seemed to like having me home again but Rumpy still ignored me. Even climbed a tree. I tried it once.

I wish they would buy a rabbit.

Charlie Brown can be found napping with one eye open for Rumpy.

Owner Jerry can be found at publisher@robinsonnews.com