by Georgie Bright Kunkel

In my women’s movement days I never gave up on equality for females even though we women still are not considered equal citizens under the US Constitution. You cannot believe the emotional tirade against passing the federal Equal Rights Amendment. As a result, feminism got a bad name. That is why I sometimes wear my summer T shirt which announces, “Feminism is the radical notion that women are people.” Who could argue with that? But there are still people who do.

Even in today’s world where women have more choices there are nude women with breast implants who pose with fully dressed Hugh Heffner for their brief period of fame at the Playboy Mansion. Even their own mothers are invited there for visits to lend credibility to the pimping of youthful female sexuality for the pleasure of this old man on Viagra. He has admitted that his favorites are now limited to only three “girls” these days.

Men dominate the fashion industry and can still seduce females into wearing pointy toed pumps requiring that they cut off their little toes to get a fit. Recently I talked to a young woman in an on-your-feet-all-day job wearing 3 inch heel sandals. I admired the beauty of her shoes but couldn’t resist announcing, “Some shoe designer styled your shoes so that when you walk you would swing your hips in front of some male ogler.” If you don’t know what ogler means, look it up in the dictionary.

Of course males and females are different. I don’t deny that. But I wasn’t taught, as a first priority, to attract a male breadwinnner. Since my mother was a widow when I was born, I was never groomed by a father to attract a man who would take care of me while I bore children. So I was brought up to make my own living. Then, if I felt like partnering, I could do that.

For a person like me to have lived with one husband for over 60 years is a testament to learning how to stay the course. We stayed together because we loved each other enough to make the adjustments we needed to make. It wasn’t always sweetness and light but it was worth being a couple when we raised our family and participated in community activities together and paid attention to extended family relationships.
Unfortunately, society has not provided newlyweds and young parents with the education and support services needed to sustain marriage. Male priorities have most often been might and power translated into war on the international scale. City living requires paying for expensive highways, overpasses and extended police protection while male dominated sports stadiums assuage the masses who gravitate to the arenas bringing profits to downtown hotels and restaurants.

The huge cement jungles where the proliferation of guns has gotten out of hand doesn’t reflect a peaceful living space. Peace starts at home and citizens must step up to the plate, so to speak, to facilitate society’s well being at its core level—the family. Because I learned the give and take of being married for many years I feel I was more able to adjust to dating after my husband died. There is no perfect couple but when one starts with a shared sense of humor and mutual interests a couple may more easily respect their differences. Yes, men and women are different and I say, “Viva la difference.” If men and women can learn to get along there is certainly hope for world peace.

Georgie Kunkel is a freelance writer who can be reached at gnkunkel@comcast.net or
206-935-8663.