Pat's View: Try a little tenderness
By Patrick Robinson
I truly believe that the coarsening of society, the loss of manners, kindness, listening and balance has grown way way way out of control.
People don't recognize that leaders who use insults and lies without fear of consequence have such a strong influence on so many. But it’s not just leaders. In our apparent desperation we’ve lost common courtesy. I remember customer service. I remember people smiling. I remember sending a card when someone is going through grief. But we have let so much of the texture of life get replaced by some weak digital imitation. We’ve replaced You are Welcome with “no problem” as if showing courtesy were an issue for that person but this time.. they’ll let it go.
In all those actions, we show who we are. People see it, and it becomes more common.
We are creatures who learn by imitation after all .. it's fundamental to the human experience. Over twenty years ago, a team of scientists discovered special brain cells, called mirror neurons, in monkeys. These cells appeared to be activated both when the monkey did something itself and when the monkey simply watched another monkey do the same thing. That mimicry has both positive and negative consequences.
We are also quick to react IN KIND when offended, or hurt. But there’s a better way and it starts with you.
How about this?
Slow the hell down, hold the door for someone else, let someone get in to the flow while driving, don’t shout to yourself or your passengers about a bad driver, give someone a meaningful compliment, pause before reacting, and tell those you love how you feel. Often
Let's assume that a Life Review is a real thing, just in case it is. You will want to look at your life as a series of acts of kindness, moments of growth, and times of joy. If you shape your life through moments of anger, disagreement, hate and pain you will recall those too. Which do you prefer?